The Grayscale System

All writers and art directors require a standard set of skills in order to move forward in the world of advertising and marketing. However, at one particular agency they believe it takes a little something extra to get ahead.

In fact, it takes 7 specific skills.

Directed by Garbage Party & JR33D
Written and Edited by Garbage Party
Photography by JR33D

All music: “Rainbow” by Battles. If you like it, purchase here.

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Implement your own Grayscale System by printing and hanging up the official poster!

High-Resolution/Vector version

Preview: 

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Text from the poster:

We recognize that all creatives require a standard set of skills in order to move forward, professionally. However, here we believe that it takes something extra to get ahead, personally. In an effort to better explore the potential within all of us, our Writers and Art Directors follow the path of The Grayscale System. Because it is non-traditional and controversial in its approach, we acknowledge the need to keep the system among ourselves for fear that the process may be compromised by outside departments. While our employees don the shirt of his or her current position, they must simultaneously respect all levels of The Grayscale System.

(key)
SKILL
AKA: The ‘street’ term
Shirt Color: The identifier
Equivalent: The traditional job title
Achievement Example: The defining act that earned the creative their position

RESOURCEFULNESS (1)
AKA: Rat-Like-Survival
Shirt Color: White 
Equivalent: Intern
Achievement Example: Survived for an entire work day on free office food

SARCASM (2)
AKA: The-Dry-Wit
Shirt Color: Ash
Equivalent: Jr. Writer / Jr. Art Director
Achievement Example: Managed to insult the client four different times in one meeting, client never knew

STUBBORNNESS (3)
AKA: Go-to-the-Mat-itis
Shirt Color: Overcast
Equivalent: Writer / Art Director
Achievement Example: Ruined nearly 5 professional relationships all for the sake of a single pun-driven headline

CUNNING (4)
AKA: Jedi-Mind-Trickery 
Shirt Color: Battleship
Equivalent: Sr. Writer / Sr. Art Director
Achievement Example: Presented “updated” work without actually changing the copy or layout

INTUITION (5)
AKA: Probably-Actually-High-At-Work
Shirt Color: Slate
Equivalent: Associate Creative Director
Achievement Example: Somehow foresaw the client’s distaste for French-sounding words, saved the project from sure disaster

STEALTH (6)
AKA: Must-Be-Sleeping-With-Someone-In-Accounting 
Shirt Color: Charcoal
Equivalent: Creative Director
Achievement Example: Went on 9 all out, company-paid boondoggles in one year under the guise of “creative presence”, on one trip expensed a set of lawn darts

PERSUASION (7)
AKA: Creative-Pitch-Magician
Shirt Color: Black
Equivalent: Group Creative Director
Achievement Example: Sold the client a campaign based solely on a ‘balls’ joke

CONTACT: usgparty@gmail.com

  • My father's murderer has not been caught due entirely to the fact that he has not yet been murdered.
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  • I wrote a spec script for a spinoff of Silk Stalkings called 'Crotch Heat.' It was well received.
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